Unqualified, yet CALLED!
I know for a fact that I have been elected by God to teach his Holy Word. And since I've come into relationship with this calling- this wonderful Spiritual Gift to teach, I have been praying consistently for God to send me all over the world to do just that. But if I can just cut right to the chase, I assumed I was only called to teach a certain group. I guess it's what the world calls, "target audience." For me, that is Wives & Wives to be. I always have a ready word for them chile!
Surely God has used me to speak life/his word into men and children as well. But in my mind, they just so happened to be there when I was delivering a word to my sister friends. LOL!
Let's take it back to late October early November 2019. I decided that I was going to be obedient to what The Lord and Pastor Mommy had pressed upon my heart to do. They were both encouraging me to, "Show myself friendly" as me and Pastor Mommy call it- to my new church home here in Terry, MS. Not that I wasn't friendly...But I'll admit, I was still going to other churches, skipping church services here to go there, going out of town, having church at home, and certainly not going to their Sunday School or Bible Study. Simply because the church setting here wasn't what I had gotten 'used' to (talk about comfort zones).
Well, I prayed and asked God to stir up a piece of desire to give this new church a fighting chance. To embrace this new thing. This new ground. This new church home. To open my heart to receive. To plant my feet where he wanted me in this church and in the community. To open my eyes to see the need. Most importantly, to equip me with a resolve in order to meet the need.
I promise it seems as if I prayed that prayer on a Saturday and on that Sunday I was committed to waking up early enough to cook breakfast, eat, get dressed, and make it there in time enough for Sunday School. Sunday school turned into attending church service in it's entirety. To altar call. To being ask by the Pastor on the spot to pray over his sheep at the altar. To attending Bible study on Wednesdays. To being asked to teach ONE night at Bible Study. To The Holy Spirit placing me on the Pastor's heart to teach the Youth Bible Study class indefinitely.
Teach who children?
As bad as I desire to have allllllllllll of Mr. Smith's chaps, teaching children has never really been my jam. I have done it before, but chile it was very brief and it was by default.
If I can be honest with y'all. I am just down right terrified of teaching kids for 4 reasons: 1. I am afraid of them rejecting me (thinking I am lame or boring, etc). 2. They can be cruel. 3. I like having control (and some of y'all kids are out of control) LOL!!! 4. And I just don't think that's my gift. I always felt like you should have a heart to teach children. And since I already made up in my mind I wanted to teach wives & wives to be, my heart was with them, ONLY. Not y'all kids. LOL!!
However, I didn't want to just come out and tell the Pastor no. Especially after he mentioned that The Holy Spirit placed me on his heart to teach the Youth Bible Study. I was thinking to myself, "Now why did he have to involve the spirit?" That means I really got to petition the throne to see what thus said The Lord!
So anywho, I asked him for time to seek The Lord & Pray.
I won't go too deep into what that process actually looked like for the sake of time. But I will tell you that it involved much prayer and several confirmations from The Lord through others to look past my weakness and insecurities and trust his plan! If I might add, I noticed the change of heart God created in me. I became more excited than nervous. Then BOOM! I said YES TO THE CALL. God reminded me that the children's salvation was much more important than my feelings or my fear! Not to mention this is training grounds for all the children I will have for my man. ;-) LOL!
Here are a few nuggets for those that are feeling a bit unqualified, unworthy, insecure, or just down right rebellious toward an assignment you've been called to:
1. PRAY & Seek The Kingdom of God until you hear a YES or NO from God.
2. Research skills associated with assignment. Shadow someone in that field. Ask questions. Watch success stories and/or videos on how to accomplish xyz.
3. Seek Wise Counsel.
4. Be honest. (With yourself & those depending on you to come through)
5. Be prepared for assignment. Plan ahead.
6. Know what's important. (Obedience over Fear)
7. What will this assignment teach you? Will it help you to grow/mature? Will it help you in the area you're praying to God for? (ex. I want children that I will someday have to teach them about God The Father, Jesus The Son, & The Holy Ghost- this will prepare me.)
8. What's on the other side of your obedience if you just say YES to God and what he has called you to do?
Well! We had our first Introductory class last week on 1/8/2020. This week will be my first time actually teaching some good ole' biblical foundational truths! Pray for me y'all.
I hope this blesses each and every one of you!
xoxo, The Finicky Wife